Dear Aunt Noor,

I am a father of an only 20-year-old son. He was raised in a high luxurious life. I thought that when I did not let him ask or need anything, he will be a man who I can depend on. After He grew up, I discovered that I was wrong and I spoiled him a lot. When I asked him to work with me, he surprised me with his careless reaction and refusal. He is lazy and a dependent person. I tried with him in different ways but nothing works; however, I am afraid that he will spend the fortune after I die. I feel guilty to what I did and I want your support.

Dear father, 

I am happy that you admit your mistake and you feel guilty about what you did. However, I was surprised when I read the following in your question and I hope that It was a wrong expression “I am afraid that he will spend the fortune after I die”  First of all I want you to ask yourself : are you afraid about the fortune or your son?

I am sure that you, as a father, care more about your son than money and from this point I will tell you my advice.

If your son is still studying university, then it is better to send him abroad During that, make sure not to give him much money so he just lives an ok life instead of the luxurious life next to you. Without his choice, he will start to depend on himself in everything and he will realize how life is hard and nothing comes easy. Also, it is important to visit him every while and then to make sure that he is doing well otherwise, it would be better to return him back.

If he has finished his university or he refuses to study at all, then try to show him that you trust him a lot and give him some money to invest in his own way. Give him your advice and be next to him when he starts. In that way he will start to feel that he has to work on his own money and he will try his best to save it because he spent a lot of effort.

To ask Aunt Noor for her Advice , email her at noor@yemenpost.net